1/4 century

I have been alive for a quarter of a century. Am I dusty? I took 4 showers in 2 days, I try to keep up.

My birthday went by pleasantly. I had a small get-together with my friends, for dinner and clubbing. The best part was it took so little effort to plan, didn't try to make it fancy or big or anything, it turned out great. There were actually multiple celebrations, with family, with friends. Had a lot of very good food, restaurants I was very glad I tried, including Chiu-Chow (Chinese), Japanese, Korean BBQ... does drinking count too? Yay!

You know how you know you're getting old? You stop getting presents. I haven't gotten a present yet but I know I'm getting a big one from my bf! I found out what it was, and if I can just get over how much it costs I'll love it. I'll take a few days. It's actually very thoughtful and exciting, it's what I envied my friends got from their bfs when we were in highschool. Now I get it and I feel bad, and even worse made my bf feel bad. I'm very much looking forward to opening it together, it will be... top 2 thoughtful present. Well, I always say, a good present is something that a person wants but wouldn't splurge on. Bonus that it's sentimental. AAh I feel so terrible for "not liking it"... but it's not that, it's just that it's $$$. Like, it's so much awesomer than thermal underwear but so much more bling! @o@ it hurts >_< But so sweet how much thought went into it...

When I go to see my little family I want to have that backyard/secret-house-camping-and blow-out-candles-on-a-cupcake thing I've been dreaming about since last year. No better time to do it than my most traumatic birthday yet right?

...I think too much about money. Money is ruining my relationship with my family. I've fallen into thinking that money is a legit replacement for affection. And being treated badly by someone who I'm half-unwillingly supporting REALLY pisses me off. And I hate how I have a legit job and still can't afford to have something as simple as my own bedroom. What can I do better? The only thing left is to change my attitude... somehow...